Seize It.

Not a Midlife Crisis, but a Midlife Seize It.

This is what my girlfriend said to me over margaritas.

Did you hear that? Lemme say it louder for the beat-down Midlifers in the back.

A MIDLIFE SEIZE-IT.

See, this friend here is someone I have known since the first day of kindergarten.

I mean we haven’t lived in the same state for more than 30 whole years, but we still managed to be in each other’s weddings 20 years ago, and also up in each other’s personal business 10 years ago, and we send each other’s parents Christmas cards still, and therefore when my friend texted me this morning that she would be  in my city tonight, I immediately made it my business to go spill my guts over drinks and soak in her wisdom even though I literally don’t recall the last time we met in person.

She’s a pick-up-wherever-you-left-off-forever-friend, and apparently Jesus told her to take me to dinner and pour some sense into me.

(I made that up. My friend probably just wanted Mexican food and then I showed up and she was an unsuspecting bystander when Jesus was like FINALLY, SOMEONE TO WHOM WHITNEY WILL ACTUALLY LISTEN.)

Because my friend took one look at my person, hugged me hard and then, right off the bat because I apparently look like I’m in crisis, said to me, “Whitney, we’re not having a Midlife Crisis, we’re having a Midlife Seize-It.”

With which she followed up without blinking, “Yes, you can write about that.”

Then the woman then proceeded to order margaritas and drop some truths on me about men and marriage and Midlife and menopause.

She is basically my hero.

I tried really hard to keep up and take mental notes, but finally I was like I’m going to order more queso and let your Midlife Seize-It magic wash all over me.

My Midlife people, in the highly-likely event you have had, or you think you are having, or will definitely have a not-so-stupid Midlife Crisis, here is a recap of Midlife Seize-It truths to breath life into your soul, courtesy of my friend, margaritas and maybe also Jesus:

1. Marriage is hard.

2. Self care looks different to different people.

3. There needs to be joy.

4. It’s okay to like food.

5. Being a parent is tough.

6. Church is complicated for a lot of us.

7. Judgment and shame generally suck.

8. Speak with honesty and boldness.

9. Sometimes we learn things the hard way.

10. And we’re halfway to 100 already, so SEIZE IT.

There you have it. Your Midlife Seize-It pep talk because you just thought you were having a Midlife Crisis.

I wish I could offer you some chips and dip and a margarita in real life to help you chew on this wisdom, but swear to goodness this conversation poured life into me that I didn’t know I needed.

Now carry on with your Midlife Seize-It, friends.

It’s normal. You’re not crazy.

And you most definitely are not alone.